The Ten Day Wait

Once a mom signs over parental rights, she has ten days (in our state) to change their mind. I've been hesitant to write about this topic for the last ten days, but now that we're on the other side of the waiting period I'd like to give it a shot.

One small reason I haven't written about it is that I haven't wanted to put any energy into the thought that we might only get to be Javi's parents for a little while. But a part of me also felt it would be disrespectful to "Marsha" to have a sort of countdown during this time, since we have never gotten any indication that she would change her mind. In fact, though we've never met her or communicated directly, we've gotten the sense over and over that Marsha is an incredible mother. Here's a quick example.

After she'd picked us to adopt her child, she sent her parents to meet us. Over lunch her father told us that Marsha had decided on a very clear birth plan: she wanted to give birth, not hold the child, and leave the hospital as soon as possible. He made it clear that he was going to make sure that nurses and staff did not interfere in her decision, and that Marsha was doing what she needed to do in order to be OK with the choice she was making for adoption.

Soon afterwards we found out from the placement agency that we'd have to wait 48 hours after Javi's birth to get him from the hospital. We were disappointed to learn that we wouldn't get to hold him in the first 48 hours of his life, but we eventually settled down and realized that Javi would get plenty of holding and good care from the nurses and staff.

However, when Marsha found out that we wouldn't get to hold Javi for 48 hours, she was upset as well. She ended up changing her birth plan and staying at the hospital with Javi. She got time to hold him, to wish him all the best, and to say goodbye. She stayed with him until she knew we were on our way to the hospital, and she left moments before we arrived. Before leaving, she dressed him in an outfit with the words "Be happy" over his heart.

This is just one small example, but Julia and I have seen on several occasions how strong, committed, decisive, loving, and giving Marsha has been in this process. Now, at the end of the waiting period, the most appropriate response for me is not necessarily to celebrate the wonderful joy that has come into our lives, but to be thankful for the mother that has made that joy possible.

Thank you, Marsha. May you be happy, too.

Javi Meets His Great Grandmother

As many guests as he's been receiving at home, yesterday Javi hit the road for his first away game. We went to see his great grandmother. They were both so happy with each other, and started nuzzling together immediately. She even sang to him. It was wonderful. He hopes to meet his other great-grandmother very soon!

We have a name!

It was pretty clear from the beginning that he was a "Javi," but it took us a while to formalize. Here's where we landed. "Marsha" gave him two names at the hospital, and of the two we really wanted to keep the name Avery. We've decided to make Javier his middle name and keep Avery his first. Julia's name is actually Mary Julia, so calling him by his middle name will be in the style of his mother.

Avery Javier C.  
Or as we call him: Javi

P.S. - A quick Wikipedia search might lead one to think that José is an obsessive baseball fan, since both Steve Avery (pitcher) and Javier López (catcher) played for both the Braves and the Red Sox, José's two favorite teams from the two baseball cities where he grew up (and also his grandfather's two favorite teams,) but that's just a coincidence. Seriously. You can turn just about any two unrelated facts into grand conspiracy through the magic of internet research.

His First Video

What a Great Surprise

So it turns out that baby boy was born on April 1st, not the 2nd. We've been April Fooled! It also means that we got to take him home today instead of tomorrow.

Here's us meeting him at the hospital for the first time.

And new baby boy sleeping.

The Paper Chain

Julia kept a paper chain of the days until the due date, removing a loop each day and taking a picture. It was a visual reminder that she kept in her office of "days until baby." Here's the result. You can click on the pictures to enlarge:

And now it's Baby Time!

Baby Boy Is Here!

Baby boy is here!

It turns out they began inducing labor on the morning of the first, and that baby boy arrived on April 2nd in the wee hours of the morning. Seven pounds one ounce; twenty two and a half inches. If all goes well with paperwork tomorrow we could be going home with him on Sunday!

I get terrible cell reception in my classroom, so I stepped out on the playground to answer the call from the agency. Kristi saw me from her classroom window as I was getting the news. She took this picture of me standing on our iconic fire engine as I was being told: "You're a dad!"

So now with fingers crossed I breathe in and breathe out. Nothing else to do at the moment but wait and hope for the best in the next 48 hours.

May he be safe,
may he be healthy,
may he be happy,
may he live with ease.

Breathe in,
breathe out.

I hope he's getting lots and lots of cuddling and holding at the hospital. And hugs. Lots of hugs.